How to handle feelings of weakness

Whenever you feel weak, remember the things that make you strong. Whenever you start to doubt yourself, remember those who believe in you.

We have all had instances where we felt weak and helpless, and when we doubted ourselves. It’s easy to look around at successful people and assume that they never have any self-doubt, and that they are always strong and confident. That’s actually not true at all.

Everybody second-guesses themselves, everybody is faced with indecision, and everybody feels like there are things they can’t handle. Some have just learned to handle feelings of weakness and doubt, and carry on with what they want to do.

Here are some valuable tips for becoming more confident and strong, and directing your energy toward self-supporting thinking and doing, so you can become like the successful people you have always admired.

1. You’re in good company! Keep in mind always that everyone has doubts. If you believe you’re the only one that lacks confidence, you just erode it even more. Everybody has doubts. Everybody.

2. Set goals and work toward them consistently. Have some short-term goals as well as the big ones - the big ones naturally breed doubt, but the small ones are achievable with just a little more effort, and you will gain a lot of confidence and satisfaction with each one you tick off your list.

3. Remember your past successes. Remember what you have done right. Remember the people who believe in you. Remember the people who support you.

4. Don’t negatively compare yourself to others. Nobody can do what you do, in the way you do it. Sure, somebody’s skills may be more advanced than yours but you can learn skills. Just focus on self-improvement; use other people as inspiration, not as a way to bring yourself down because you aren’t as “good” as them (quotes intended… because maybe you are significantly better at something else than they are!)

5. Stop worrying about what people think! Trust me… they are not thinking about you very much at all. They are thinking more about themselves, their problems, and their goals. If people react negatively to what you’re doing, send them some love and keep on keeping on. It’s your goal, your life. Let your life be a reflection of staying true to your values and living your dream!

6. Treat negative feedback as a lesson, not a slap in the face. It’s hard to take your ego out of negative feedback but if you choose to use it as a catalyst for improvement, then it doesn’t sting nearly as much as if you take it personally.

7. Don’t attach yourself to your goals. Don’t see yourself as a failure because you failed to achieve a goal. The goal really doesn’t matter in the long run - it’s a carrot to get you to try harder, learn more, do more, and think in new ways (in other words, grow) - but what do you do when a goal IS accomplished? You move right on to the next one, because the real joy is in the doing, not the “end” of achieving (because it’s never the end). The glow of triumphant achievement is short-lived… and so if you don’t achieve “this” goal or “that” goal just set your sights on another one, learn from what happened, and keep going.

8. Be decisive but flexible. When you have to make a decision, just make one - not impulsively; do your homework, but also trust your gut instincts. Don’t be afraid to change course later if you need to if you realize the choice you made isn’t working out. As you gain new knowledge and information, you will naturally “correct” your course.

9. Face your fears. Meditation is a great time to face your fears! Fears are just emotions so allowing yourself to sit with and sit through the fear - allowing it to rise and fall within you - will teach you that you do not have to fear the fear. You are still the master of yourself, you get to make decisions and act on them, no matter the emotions that you are feeling.

10. Push yourself. Get out of that comfort zone! The more you push yourself, the more you'll recognize and appreciate what you are capable of. The trick is - push just a little more than you’re used to, so you don’t overwhelm yourself. Think of it this way: if you can do 10 push ups right now, challenge yourself to do 12 or 15. Small improvements give you faster results!

11. Self-talk yourself into confidence. Are you listening to that little voice that says, “I don’t know… that looks awfully scary… I’m not sure… maybe this isn’t a good idea…”? Well, you can drown it out with, “Hey, good job, you’re facing this like a champ… you’re doing great… just a little more… you can do it!” Be your own coach and talk yourself into it!

Use these tips to become more confident in managing negative thoughts and feelings, so you can do what your heart desires!